Tuesday, August 31, 2010

To Pharm or Not to Pharm



Those of us with Bipolar Disorder are notorious for discontinuing taking our prescribed medication, but my recent crash after a six month-long mixed episode of BD has me considering doing just that.  This is scary territory - very scary.  Most reported incidences of us discontinuing our medications don't have happy endings.  It's with a great deal of trepidation I'm even investigating this option.

Clearly, what I was doing and the pharmaceuticals I was taking when I attempted suicide last month were not working.  Nor have they done so in the six years since my diagnosis and treatment began.  I've been on numerous "mood stabilizers" and most of the anti-depression drugs available, including everything from the old tricyclics to the newest models on the road.  I've been prescribed various pharmaceutical "cocktails," including  drugs to address anxiety and sleep issues.  I've been compliant, taking them all as prescribed.  I've had to discontinue many prescriptions due to side effects, including one event that resulted in my being hospitalized for a week so I could be detoxed from a drug I developed toxicity to.  But I'm still depressed, a bit manic, and not sleeping well.  It's hard for me to see how continuing the same course of treatment offers much chance for a better outcome.

I've decided to learn more about holistic, non-pharmaceutical approaches to dealing with BD.  There are a lot of them to consider.  I'm looking at light therapy, several kinds of exercise, aromatherapy, nutrition, acupuncture or acupressure, hypnosis, Tai Chi, vitamin and nutritional supplements, sleep therapy, cognitive behavioral therapy and more.  Some of these things I'm already doing, but I could do much more.  In the realm of nutrition, for example, a biggie is to stop eating refined sugars.  I do eat well, in general, but sugar is a big no-no for those of us dealing with Bipolar Disorder and it's relatively easy ditch it.

So, there are alternatives to consider, but are they enough?  Can I devise a plan that better treats my illness as its symptoms manifest themselves specific to me?  Can I do it without pharmaceuticals?  Safely?  Is it advisable to make the change gradually, including a transition period during which I wean myself from pills as I introduce more holistic treatments?  Will I ultimately decide to go with some combination of pharmaceuticals and more holistic remedies?

I won't make this decision alone and will talk to both my medical doctor and my mental health services providers as I continue to explore this for myself.  Perhaps they'll suggest something I'm missing.  In the meantime, I'm gathering information and learning a lot I didn't already know, including that many holistic approaches must be modified when used by those of us with BD.  There are also financial considerations.  My Medicare Part D prescription coverage will pay for bottles of hundreds of pharmaceuticals but not for the alternative treatments I'm considering.

I'll end by acknowledging once again that this is very scary territory to be charting.  I know too well the stories of horrific consequences as a result of many others doing what I'm considering now doing myself.  But I keep coming back to the "what I've been doing isn't working" place.  All options are on the table.  I'll share with you what I come up with as I get further into the process of exploring them.

Cosmic Dust


Cosmic Dust

Most unpretentious, finest grained particles of chaos
Swarming in the finite abyss of immeasurable time-space,
The wholly hidden sanctuary of the spirit.

Irreducible crucible from which we are formed and called forth
By a silent voice speaking in the absolute dark,
Summoned forward by word whisperings
In the invisible inaudible dimension of all that will be.

Awakening to Life, to Love, to the Possibility of.

- Dixie 2010

The Tyranny of the Majority

If I could place but one book on the required reading list of every high school in the nation, it would be Lani Guiner's The Tyranny of the Majority:  Fundamental Fairness in Representative Democracy.  Early in his presidency, Bill Clinton nominated Guiner for the Supreme Court but threw her to the wolves when those with no understanding of her positions screeched from the right.  I'm still pissed that he lost a few vertebrae so early after he took office.  Tyranny contains the now infamous law review articles the media distorted in their presentation of her as "The Quota Queen," a title so far wide of Guinier's actual positions one wonders if they even read them. These articles not only call attention to the issues we face as an electorate in a racist society, they present thoughtful possibilities for solutions. It's not an easy subject; most don't want to know. That's why she isn't on the Supreme Court today.  It really doesn't matter that we've elected a black president. What matters is that we start to understand as a nation the tyranny Guinier lays out in her book. It was published in 1994 and I believe it to be as relevant today as it was then.  


goddam America Award


Today's (August 23, 2020) "goddam America Award" goes to Major General James E. Chambers and his "Spiritual Fitness Concerts." That right thar's yer f'real Holy Crap, y'all.

goddam America Award


My "goddam America Award" goes today (August 22, 2010) to blogger Pamela Geller. Ms Geller latched onto a non-story and turned it into "news", flaming anti-Muslim fervor when she did so.  If not for her, there would have been no nation wide anti-Islam backlash against the proposed Islamic center in New York City.

goddam America Award



My "goddam America Award" is today (August 30, 2010) deservedly bestowed on Alveda King for pimping herself and the family name by speaking at the Beck rally in D.C. on Saturday. Oh well, at least we now know the Tea Party isn't all white. Wait. Wasn't that why she was asked to speak in the first place?

goddam America Award


My "goddam America Award" this morning (August 27, 2010) goes to Sarah Palin, who continues to rail against a woman's right to self determination. Palin admonishes us to "save our sisters in the womb," while she works hard to deny those same "sisters" the most basic right of all when they're actually our "sisters." I find it particularly repugnant that she and her supporters attempt to frame her and her message as "today's" feminism. A pox on ye!

Thursday, August 26, 2010

goddam America Award

My "goddam America Award" for today is bestowed on Glenn Beck for his planned rally on Saturday, the anniversary of MLK's "Dream" speech. Beck asserts there's nothing political about the rally, though both he and Sarah Palin will be there. Mr. Beck had this to say: "This is going to be an iconic event...This is going to be a moment that you'll never be able to paint people as haters, racists, none of it. This is a moment, quite honestly, that I think we reclaim the civil rights movement. It has been so distorted and so turned upside down. It is an abomination." Oh my. This from the guy who a couple of days ago told us it was only a "coincidence" that his rally is planned for this anniversary. Yeah, right.

Wednesday, August 25, 2010

goddam America Award

The state of Arizona has earned my "goddam America Award."  Do I really need to explain why?

Tuesday, August 24, 2010

goddam America Award

Today's "goddam America Award" goes to Terry Jones, pastor of the Dove World Outreach Center in Gainesville, FL. Jones, author of Islam Is of the Devil, plans to lead his congregation in burning copies of the Koran in observance of the 9th anniversary of 9/11.